First Fast

Yesterday, in observance of the time between Good Friday and Easter Sunday, I committed to a Fast.

I have never done a Fast before - food is one of my favorite things! But this past Lent has been the first time I truly observed many of the spiritual disciplines, and so I thought I should also explore what this Fasting was all about.

In my reading and talking to other Christians who are much more spiritually developed than me, I would hear them say they would fast and pray over a decision - and quite frankly, I just didn't get how fasting would bring me closer to an understanding of anything besides how hungry I was....

So, with mixed emotions on Friday evening, I officially limited myself to water (plus 2 cups of morning coffee on Saturday).

Beginning the day with my normal quiet time, I came across a wonderful quote in the book "A Guide to Prayer for All God's People". This particular reading came from "From Radiance of the Inner Splendor" by Lloyd John Ogilvie (emphasis mine)

Let me risk a description of what has been the experience of some of us at Lent. When we say that Christ pervades all aspects of our human nature, it does not mean that he effects a takeover of our will. He did not do that before we became his children' he does not do it now. It does mean that we set our hearts in the direction of what we know to be God's heart in the matter - and begin to model our behaviour in that direction - the Spirit within immediately reinforces our finite strength with infinite strength. The synthesis is so smooth. It is sometimes impossible to tell where our strength ends and his begins.

That quote was perfect to assist me for this Fast. To think of the Spirit, melding its infinite strength with my finite strength to get me through this fast...I drew on that many times through the day.

But the true spiritual aspect of my Fast didn't really occur until about 1:00 am - when I woke up from sleep so TERRIBLY HUNGRY. I was laying there debating with myself whether I could continue all the way till morning. Even justifying how I could break fast since it was technically Easter since it was after midnight! When you are drowsy, and food deprived, it is easy to lose that finite strength and time to dip into that infinite strength of the Spirit.

So there I was having argument with myself (and about to lose the battle), when for some reason a song we sing in church just entered my head. "Our strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord". I kept hearing this verse over and over and was then reminded about the words that morning of the Spirit and its strength. And suddenly I became like a little child covering their ears singing "la la la" when they don't want to listen. With the aid of this song verse I could block out the tempting calls from my kitchen. I was going to win this battle over my hunger! I made it through that temptation with the help of the Spirit - of that I am certain. Perhaps one day when I am more spiritually developed, I can battle back temptation with scripture instead of a song :)

After that mini skirmish with my will, I was able to return to slumber and didn't wake up until 6:00 am - where I very appreciatively broke fast.

Now on the backside of this Fast - I have a much deeper understanding of how it can draw you into a deeper relationship and can give special meaning in discernment and prayer, but I think it is a discipline to be reserved for special circumstances.